court testimony

tashasdaddy

Honorary Moderator Emeritus
Joined
Nov 11, 2005
Messages
51,019
If you ever testify in court, you might wish you could have been as sharp as this policeman. He was being cross-examined by a defense attorney during a felony trial. The lawyer was trying to undermine the policeman's credibility...

Q: "Officer -- did you see my client fleeing the scene?"
A: "No sir. But I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender, running several blocks away."

Q: "Officer -- who provided this description?"
A: "The officer who responded to the scene."

Q: "A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender. Do you trust your fellow officers?"
A: "Yes, sir . With my life."

Q: "With your life? Let me ask you this then officer. Do you have a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?"
A: "Yes sir, we do!"

Q: "And do you have a locker in the room?"
A: "Yes sir, I do."

Q: "And do you have a lock on your locker?"
A: "Yes sir."

Q: "Now why is it, officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with these same officers?"
A: "You see, sir -- we share the building with the court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk through that room."

The courtroom erupted in laughter, and a prompt recess was called. The officer on the stand has been nominated for this year's "Best Comeback" line -- and we think he'll win.
 

Bob_VT

Moderator & Unofficial iBoats Historian
Staff member
Joined
May 19, 2001
Messages
26,064
Re: court testimony

Great stuff!! :D :D :D
 

rocky100

Petty Officer 3rd Class
Joined
Aug 9, 2007
Messages
99
Re: court testimony

I like that-got my morning off with a good laugh!:)
 

wavrider

Chief Petty Officer
Joined
Nov 26, 2007
Messages
543
Re: court testimony

Great reply, made the afternoon here at the office
 

KeltonKrew

Lieutenant
Joined
Jul 31, 2002
Messages
1,325
Re: court testimony

isn't this disrectful to lawyers...it could hurt their feelings....stereotyping all lawyers as crooks!
 

tashasdaddy

Honorary Moderator Emeritus
Joined
Nov 11, 2005
Messages
51,019
Re: court testimony

i'll leave that alone, my uncle, and cousin are both thie--- lawyers.
 
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