what not to call your dog

[phwrd]

WHAT NOT TO CALL YOUR DOG

Now Sex has been very embarrassing to me. When I went to City Hall to renew his dog license, I told the clerk ? I would like a license for Sex? He said, ?I'd like to have one too.? Then I said, ?But this is a dog.? He said he didn't care what she looked like.

Then I said, ?But you don't understand. I've had Sex since I was nine years old.? He said I must have been quite a kid.

When I got married and went on my honeymoon, I took the dog with me. I told the motel clerk that I wanted a room for my wife and me and an special room for sex.

He said every room in the place was for sex. I said, ?you don't understand, Sex keeps me awake at night..? The clerk said, ?me too?.

One day I entered Sex into a contest, but before the competition began, the dog ran away. Another contestant asked me why I was just standing there looking around. I told him I had planned to have Sex in the contest. He told me I should have sold my own tickets. ?But you don't understand.?. I said ?I had hoped to have Sex on TV?. He called me a show-off.

When my wife and I separated, we went to court to fight for custody of the dog. I said, ?Your honor, I had Sex before I was married?. The Judge said ?me, too?. Then I told him that after I was married, Sex left me. He said ?Me, too?.

Last night Sex ran off again. I spent hours looking around town for him. A cop came over to me and asked, ?What are you doing in this alley at 4 o'clock in the morning?. I said, ?I'm looking for Sex?.

My case comes up Friday.

 

[puddle jumper]

Re: what not to call your dog

I wanted to name my dog askhim. But my wife would not let me.

Could you imagine screaming the name sex as your looking for your dog in the city

 

[beerfilter]

Re: what not to call your dog

Oldie but a goodie !

 

[IVAZ]

Re: what not to call your dog

My next door neighbors dogs name is Sexy. He is mean, smelly and fat. I dont know why they chose that name.

 

[Splat]

Re: what not to call your dog

I named my dog DeeOhGee (pronounced D.O.G.) I get lots of funny looks and even more laughs when people realize I'm calling my dog D. O. G.

Its almost as bad as naming her sex.

Bill

 

[tashasdaddy]

Re: what not to call your dog

all of my Grandfathers dogs were name "DOG", ask him why, he said it was easy to remember.

 

[JB]

Re: what not to call your dog

Had a barn cat once that we called "F-one-d-zero". He was joined by a cat named "P-one-g", who had a litter of kittens named:

b-u-eleven,
c-zero-w,
d-zero-g,
h-zero-g, and
cat.

 

[ezmobee]

Re: what not to call your dog

My neighbor's a bit odd. Got 2 puppies last year. A basset and a choc. lab. They named the basset Gaylord (and they don't see anything funny about it) and the lab tubby. The weird thing is that they had the name picked out for the lab before they even had it. How'd they know she would be tubby?

My grandfather named all his dogs Queen and they were all brittanys. Makes trying to tell specific family stories a little hard.

 

[Shizzy]

Re: what not to call your dog

My grandfather named all his dogs Queen and they were all brittanys. Makes trying to tell specific family stories a little hard.

My Great Grandmother did the same thing. every dog was named Tippy and was some kind of white furry farm dog. My Dad says as far back as he can remember she had a white dog named Tippy.

 

[Vlad D Impeller]

Re: what not to call your dog

Had a barn cat once that we called "F-one-d-zero". He was joined by a cat named "P-one-g", who had a litter of kittens named:

b-u-eleven,
c-zero-w,
d-zero-g,
h-zero-g, and
cat.

That is some odd names for cats

Did you get another after Catzilla ?

 

[JB]

Re: what not to call your dog

Yes, Vlad.

Miss Kitty now owns my house. I found her during Desert Storm, while house-sitting my daughter Alice's house (she was deployed). When Alice came home Miss Kitty stayed there.

She moved to my Son John's house when Alice's boys graduated HS around 1998, and to my house when John got married last Summer.

Yup, that makes Miss Kitty 18.

 

[mthieme]

Re: what not to call your dog

lol.
That's cute...never heard it before.

 

[SS MAYFLOAT]

Re: what not to call your dog

I had a neighbor once that had one of those foo foo dogs. Small, cute, and an attitude. Its name was Tiz.

I had to laugh one morning as the neighbor lady was on the front door stoop in her night gown calling "Here Tiz, here Tiz, here Tiz. It made me wonder if she was calling the dog or advertising

 

[Beefer]

Re: what not to call your dog

I named my cat, who is now 16 years, Flea. I got her when she was 6 weeks old, and she was this tiny little black thing in my hand. I sadi, "she looks like a flea." The name stuck...