Kenneth Brown
Captain
- Joined
- Feb 3, 2003
- Messages
- 3,481
Lawyers should never ask a witness a question if they<br />aren't prepared for the answer.<br />At the start of a trial, a Southern small town<br />prosecuting attorney called his first witness, a grand motherly, elderly<br />woman to the stand. <br />He approached her and asked, "Mrs. Jones, do you know me?"<br /><br />She responded, "Why, yes I do know you, Mr. Williams. <br />I've known you since you were a young boy, and frankly, you've been a<br />big disappointment to me.<br />You lie, you cheat on your wife, and you manipulate<br />people and talk about them behind their backs. You think you're a big<br />shot when you haven't the brains to realize you will never amount to<br />anything more than a two-bit paper pusher. Yes, I know you."<br /><br />The Lawyer was stunned! <br />Not knowing what else to do, he pointed across the room and asked, <br />"Mrs. Jones do you know the defense attorney?"<br /><br />She again replied, "Why yes, I do. I've known Mr.<br />Bradley since he was a youngster too. He's lazy, bigoted, and he has a<br />drinking problem. He can't build a normal relationship with anyone and<br />his law practice is one of the worst in the entire state. Not to<br />mention he cheats on his wife with three different women. <br /> One of them is your wife. Yes, I know him."<br /><br />The defense attorney almost died.<br /><br />The judge asked both counselors to approach the bench,<br />and in a very quiet voice, said, "If either of you b*stards asks her<br />if she knows me, I'll throw your sorry *sses in jail for contempt."
