SlowlySinking
Master Chief Petty Officer
- Joined
- Oct 31, 2002
- Messages
- 897
The best living will yet.<br /><br />Ever since the Terry Schiavo debacle there has been an increase of living wills from 10,000 a year to 40,000. This is our form for the New <br />Living Will. I think this is the best living will form that I've seen. <br /><br />It's easy to understand, and it makes perfect sense as a well. It will help cut the paper work.<br /><br /><br />I, _________________________, being of sound mind and body, do not wish to be kept alive indefinitely by artificial means. Under no circumstances should my fate be put in the hands of pinhead politicians who couldn't pass <br />ninth-grade biology if their lives depended on it or lawyers and doctors interested in simply running up the bills. <br />If a reasonable amount of time passes and I fail to move or ask for at least one of the following:<br /> ______a Bloody Mary,<br /> ______a Margarita<br /> ______a Bud Light<br /> ______a Martini<br /> ______a Vodka and Tonic<br /> ______a steak<br /> ______a lobster or crab legs<br /> ______the remote control<br /> ______chocolate<br /> ______sex<br /> ______a tee time<br /> ______my boat keys<br /><br />It should be presumed that I won't ever get better and therefore must be dead. When such a determination is reached, I hereby instruct my appointed person and attending physicians to pull the plug, reel in the tubes, sell my boat, and call it a day. 
