xtraham
Lieutenant
- Joined
- Jul 20, 2006
- Messages
- 1,425
Dan Rather, Peter Jennings, Cokie Roberts and a tough old U.S. Marine
Sergeant were all captured by terrorists in Iraq. The leader of the terrorists told
them that he would grant them each one last request
before they were beheaded.
Dan Rather said, "Well, I'm a Texan, so I'd like one last bowlful of
hot spicy chili." The leader nodded to an underling who left and
returned with the chili. Rather ate it all and said, "Now I can die
content."
Peter Jennings said, "I am Canadian, so I'd like to hear the song "O
Canada"one last time." The leader nodded to a terrorist who had studied the
Western world and knew the music. He returned with some rag-tag musicians and
played the anthem. Jennings sighed and declared he could now die peacefully.
Cokie Roberts said, "I'm a reporter to the end. I want to take out my
tape recorder and describe the scene here and what's about to happen. Maybe
someday someone will hear it and know that I was on the job till the end."
The leader directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder and Roberts dictated
some comments. She then said, "Now I can die happy."
The leader turned and said, "And now, Mr. U.S. Marine, what is your
final wish?"
"Kick me in the butt," said the Marine.
"What?" asked the leader. "Will you mock us in your last hour?"
"No, I'm not kidding. I want you to kick me in the butt," insisted the
Marine. So the leader shoved him into the open and kicked him in the
butt. The Marine went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm
pistol from inside his cammies, and shot the leader dead.
In the resulting confusion, he leapt to his knapsack, pulled out his M4
carbine and sprayed the terrorists with gunfire. Moments later, all the
terrorists were either dead or fleeing for their lives.
As the Marine was untying Rather, Jennings and Roberts, they asked him, "Why
didn't you just shoot them in the beginning? Why did you ask them to kick
you in the butt first?"
"What," replied the Marine, "and have you three jackasses report that I
was the aggressor?"
Sergeant were all captured by terrorists in Iraq. The leader of the terrorists told
them that he would grant them each one last request
before they were beheaded.
Dan Rather said, "Well, I'm a Texan, so I'd like one last bowlful of
hot spicy chili." The leader nodded to an underling who left and
returned with the chili. Rather ate it all and said, "Now I can die
content."
Peter Jennings said, "I am Canadian, so I'd like to hear the song "O
Canada"one last time." The leader nodded to a terrorist who had studied the
Western world and knew the music. He returned with some rag-tag musicians and
played the anthem. Jennings sighed and declared he could now die peacefully.
Cokie Roberts said, "I'm a reporter to the end. I want to take out my
tape recorder and describe the scene here and what's about to happen. Maybe
someday someone will hear it and know that I was on the job till the end."
The leader directed an aide to hand over the tape recorder and Roberts dictated
some comments. She then said, "Now I can die happy."
The leader turned and said, "And now, Mr. U.S. Marine, what is your
final wish?"
"Kick me in the butt," said the Marine.
"What?" asked the leader. "Will you mock us in your last hour?"
"No, I'm not kidding. I want you to kick me in the butt," insisted the
Marine. So the leader shoved him into the open and kicked him in the
butt. The Marine went sprawling, but rolled to his knees, pulled a 9 mm
pistol from inside his cammies, and shot the leader dead.
In the resulting confusion, he leapt to his knapsack, pulled out his M4
carbine and sprayed the terrorists with gunfire. Moments later, all the
terrorists were either dead or fleeing for their lives.
As the Marine was untying Rather, Jennings and Roberts, they asked him, "Why
didn't you just shoot them in the beginning? Why did you ask them to kick
you in the butt first?"
"What," replied the Marine, "and have you three jackasses report that I
was the aggressor?"
