Someone turned me in (updated)

[studlymandingo]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

I live out in the country and they "can" make you pay taxes on ever vehicle you have, running or not.
Either that or a 8' high fence around them all.

Don't ask.

I was recently cited by the city here for having a 6' fence in the "front" of our house. I have a corner lot and we use the "side" of our house as the "effective front" (this is what it states in our official proceedings). The street where the "front" of our house is located is one of two streets on and off of a pretty sizeable residential island. Now in our city, you can put a 6' fence in the front if the street is designated "busy" by the city; ours is designated "neighborhood collector" which does not qualify for their designation of busy and in fact it is only busy in the mornings and evenings when people are going to and from work. You can have a 4' fence on the front of your house, which is what we have I just added 2' of lattice to the top and we are growing passionflower vine on the lattice. The violation notice we received for this was not as a result of a neighbor's complaint, in fact we got a neighborhood award this spring for our landscaping improvements.

The violation came about as a result of my wanting to build a garage onto my house. I applied for a varience on what is technically the rear of our house (it is basically the side if you take into account the "effective front") beside my lot there there is a utility easement that provides a 16' buffer between me and my neighbor. When the compliance guy came out he noted the fence and sent us a violation notice with a reinspect date; to prepare myself for the reinspect date, I parked my boat, truck, and work trailer in my side yard. When the guy came back out he said that I couldn't park these vehicles in my front yard to which I replied "this isn't my front yard, it's the side yard and according to city code you can park anything in your side yard as long as it doesn't protrude into the front yard, that is why you don't like my fence in the front yard, right?" That is when he told me that my "side yard" is the effective front. Well then, that would make the fence in question in compliance as it is the "effective side" of our house, and the setback from the easement would be down to 3.5' since that side is the other "effective side" of my house, so all is good, I can build my garage where I want and you can shut up about the lattice on top of the fence.

Well not exactly, I still have yet another hearing to attend for the varience, and another hearing to attend for the fence. The fence violation states that the 6' fence in the front yard is an "eyesore"; I have signatures from every person who lives in our neighborhood that says otherwise, not to mention our little landscaping award.

The contention for the varience is that if they grant me permission to build a garage along the alleyway then it will set precedent for others who would then want to build a garage along the alley... My house is the ONLY house that abuts that alleyway that does not have a garage built on it..........​

 

[OldMercsRule]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Hmmmmm. And people ask me why I call my place The Hideout.

Yup JB, RR island is the same way. Hard fer the Libs to cornplain about me junk collectin', (ya know ol' black anchors fer parts n' what not), if they may suffer a broken neck when they are tresspassin; snoopin' n' mindin' me business as Liberals jus' luv ta do. RR island is posted n' ol' Murky enforces the postin'! (It used to be more friendly, but the property values have gone through the roof n' the California Libs n' Microsoft Millionares seem ta like to have their lawyers do their neighborly relations fer 'em. N' Lord only knows how the local enforcers will give ya a rectal exam if ya fight with 'em.

Don't paint the house pink or put the pink terlet in yer lawn SS, just get some ugly blue tarps n' cover 'em, n' lay low fer a bit.

I also have the personality to taunt Liberal or otherwise disposed "mind my business" neigbors too, but I'm real REAL carefull to pick me battles. I remember the shocked n' scared look when a Liberal neighbor who had lectured me fer a few minutes about slowly rolling through a crosswalk in front of me house to park, that he had boldly, (chin out with a dissaprovin' glare only a Seattle Lib sooooooo full of themselves can give ya) started to cross in the cross walk after I was commited. I had meekly taken his carp fer a few minutes when he looked as if he was gettin' a second wind. I asked him if he wanted to call 9-11 n' arrange fer an ambulance to standby before I escalated matters. (think I told him I might tear his head off n' spit on his neck), SHUT HIM UP REAL FAST. Those moments are worth savoring, 'cause yer not likely ta win if ya fight city hall. Pick yer time and be smart about it, n' forget about it til' that time comes, or it will hurt you more then the mind yer business neighbor. JR

 

[12Footer]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Yes, zay have vays of controlink you. I found zis out ven I lived in der voods of north fort myers. Zay came right after zee liberal "rancher" moofed-in next to vut I though vus my property.. Zee county almost got my land.
It vus tounch und go for a vile, but I had friends who got zere dogs called-off long unoof for me to achieve complaince vith der master race.

 

[OldMercsRule]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

LOL 12er, you have a way with yer very unique 'cornpone' that is not easy to copy or I would!! LOL LOL JR

 

[12Footer]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Sank you,JR. I vill take zat as zee compliment.

 

[Bass Man Bruce]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

I used to be a "Blight Officer" about ten years ago. This thread is like a deja vu nightmare! . I also worked in the township zoning office. Every time you do something 1/2 the people hate your guts and the other half don't care if you live or die. I didn't last long (6 mos) as that was the worst job I've ever had.

 

[ZmOz]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

The cranky old bag across the street complained about one of my trucks a while ago and sent the cops out. Technically it was parked there too long, but it's running, and registered. She also complained about a guy's camaro up the street that wasn't being moved. Neither of these vehicles are an eyesore or were causing problems for anyone. So, I went and made a deal with the guy up the street, every few days I park my truck in front of his house and he parks the camaro in front of mine. Then we switch. We both could find other parking options but we do it just to **** the old ***** off.

 

[OldMercsRule]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

The cranky old bag across the street complained about one of my trucks a while ago and sent the cops out. Technically it was parked there too long, but it's running, and registered. She also complained about a guy's camaro up the street that wasn't being moved. Neither of these vehicles are an eyesore or were causing problems for anyone. So, I went and made a deal with the guy up the street, every few days I park my truck in front of his house and he parks the camaro in front of mine. Then we switch. We both could find other parking options but we do it just to **** the old ***** off.

LOL LOL very good ZmOz.

I had a nasty neighbor who hasseled me fer a few years, doin' all sorts of irritating stuff, n' we were *** fer tat never actualy causin' real trouble for either party.

Finally, two of my very small kids, (I would put on the kids bike helmets) next to his yard, n' the two small kids, (five years old) after gettin' their helmets on ran up on his lawn and he did not know I was standing behind the bushes getting helmets on my other kids.

He came running out of his front poarch YELLING: I'M CALLING THE COPS ON YOU!! Acting real tough n' mean, (my son is deaf, n' my step son could hear him yell). He chased the boys towards me yard n' I stepped out right in his face, (bein' carefull not to step off the public sidewalk) n' got about a 1/2 inch off his nose n' said: "yer a real tough guy when ya scare little kids, care to take it up with me?" He sized me up n' could see I was serious and I then told him, (he was a pipe smoker with very brown teeth), that his "tooth brush wasn't makin' it".

One of my buddies told me to pick a true personal aspect to hurl an insult ya want to stick for a very long time, (as the other person knows they have that trait). We did not come to blows, and he had to slink back to his house and we never had confrontations again. JR

 

[RubberFrog]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Easier there Mr Eastwood....

 

[OldMercsRule]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Easier there Mr Eastwood....

Yup, whoever wrote his lines did come up with some real classics that I've been known to use from time to time. I woulda used the "mouthwash" line but me breath is non to sweet either so I modified it to fit the task at hand. The pickin' a personal characteristic does really work as I've used that fer years since learnin' the tactic. JR

 

[Scaaty]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

just get some ugly blue tarps n' cover 'em,

UGGGGG.....I HATE THOSE DAMN blue tarps this neck of the woods Jim.
Look worse than the junk underneath!
Aint NOTHING blue here in winter..all green and brown and gray.
Harbor Frieght sells all sizes in those colors. Brown and green a step up in duribilty, and the silver is for years. Silver is all I use. (I'm a high class Redneck!)

 

[SS MAYFLOAT]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

I live on part of the Old Lincoln Highway, so parking in front of his house is not an option. Geeesh, I've lived here for 8 years now and have never said a word to him. (We call him Mr GM since that is where he works). When he is outside he constantly is eyeballing my house. I have 325' of frontage, so my property ends up being in front of both houses across the street.

Sure is funny that there is a big ole WWI tank sitting in the yard of the Legion Hall and it don't have tags. What about that? It's catta corner in the opposite direction of Mr GM.

My neigbor next door is old, has lots of junk and we have an agreement. I don't complain about his stuff n vice versa. Told him about the problem and he is PO'd about it. He offered some Round Up to put in some balloons to lob over into GM's yard.

BTW, 12er only talks that way when he has a big gob of backy in is mouth

 

[OldMercsRule]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

UGGGGG.....I HATE THOSE DAMN blue tarps this neck of the woods Jim.
Look worse than the junk underneath!
Aint NOTHING blue here in winter..all green and brown and gray.
Harbor Frieght sells all sizes in those colors. Brown and green a step up in duribilty, and the silver is for years. Silver is all I use. (I'm a high class Redneck!)

I Agree Scaaty, I am a low class red neck but I also use the silver ones, (brown on the other side), as they last a lot longer too. In SS's case I'm tryin' to give him advice on hour to iritate both the city, (but cormply with the law or regulation), and the neighbor to flush 'em out, so he finds out who is messin' with him. Blue looks just awfull! JR

 

[woodrat]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Hard fer the Libs to cornplain about me junk collectin',

interesting. the first time I got ratted out for owning too many cars, there wasn't a lib in sight. It was the fuddy old fart across the street, with the flag always flying. He had bought a cheap lot in a cheap part of a very cheap, beat up little logging town, right across from the cheap little shack I had purchased. He put up a cheap mobile home on the lot, started mowing his yard about every day, and then started complaining about my place and a couple of others. Didn't he understand WHY he was able to buy that lot so cheap? Guess not. I got tired of fighting with him and I eventually moved. The city never did take much of an interest in my scene there, I just had to deal with him complaining and writing me nasty letters.

So, just for the record, OMR, the inability to mind one's own business actually seems to cross political lines. Imagine that!

 

[jbjennings]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

So, just for the record, OMR, the inability to mind one's own business actually seems to cross political lines. Imagine that![/QUOTE

In the words of the cable guy, "I don't care who 'ya are, that there is funny!"

 

[waterinthefuel]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

UGGGGG.....I HATE THOSE DAMN blue tarps this neck of the woods Jim.
Look worse than the junk underneath!

Funny you mention them. To me, in south Louisiana, when you say blue tarp you make me think of New Orleans, post Katrina. There were so many blue tarps on roofs I was told you could see them from space.

Sorry, just a little change of subject. Not meant to hijack the thread.

 

[Scaaty]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Funny you mention them. To me, in south Louisiana, when you say blue tarp you make me think of New Orleans, post Katrina. There were so many blue tarps on roofs I was told you could see them from space.

Sorry, just a little change of subject. Not meant to hijack the thread.

Florida has a big blue tarp market too..(damn bugs!)

 

[rwise]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

ah yes [SIZE=-1]communism[/SIZE] at it's finest!


SS Freedom would scare the hell outa them!

 

[12Footer]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Blue tarps from outer space and candy wrappers...New Orleans ought to be a hoot next mardi gras!

I wonder what the restrictions are like in N/O

 

[SS MAYFLOAT]

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

Re: Someone turned me in (aaaargh)

LMAO @ 12er

Finally got things cleaned up, boats moved around, brothers race car gone, mowed the weeds, Bradley in the garage (its in bad shape, I should be whipped), and all done without a single beer.

Found out my bucket truck can double as a wrecker. I used it to lift the front of my Bradley and towed it out to the garage. Yep, I guess that makes me a redneck. Just wonderin if my neighbor wants to play redneck games? What does antifreeze do when mixed with fuel oil? Does it get all messy and gooey like it does in an engine when the coolant gets in the oil?

Just to let you know, those blue tarps match the blue paint on my boat. Good thing I painted it blue!