One day my housework-challenged husband decided to wash <br />> his <br />> <br />> sweatshirt. <br />> <br />> Seconds after he stepped into the laundry room, he shouted <br />> to <br />> <br />> me, "What setting do I use on the washing machine?" <br />> <br />> "It depends," I replied. "What does it say on your shirt?" <br />> <br />> He yelled back, "University of Oklahoma." 
<br />> <br />> And they say blondes are dumb... _______________________ <br />> <br />> A couple is lying in bed.. The man says, <br />> <br />> "I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world" <br />> <br />> The woman says, "I'll miss you..." <br />> <br />> _______________________ <br />> <br />> "It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he <br />> <br />> stepped out of the shower, "honey, <br />> <br />> what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the <br />> lawn <br />> <br />> like this?" <br />> <br />> "Probably that I married you for your money," she replied. <br />> _______________________ <br />> <br />> He said - Since I first laid eyes on you, I have wanted to <br />> make <br />> <br />> love to you really badly. <br />> <br />> She said - Well, you succeeded. <br />> <br />> ______________________ <br />> <br />> He said - Shall we try swapping positions tonight? <br />> <br />> She said - That's a good idea... you stand by the ironing <br />> board <br />> <br />> while I sit on the sofa and fart. _______________________ <br />> <br />> He said - What have you been doing with all the grocery <br />> money I <br />> <br />> gave you? <br />> <br />> She said - Turn sideways and look in the mirror <br />> ______________________ Q: <br />> What do you call an intelligent, good looking, <br />> sensitive man? A: A rumor _______________________ <br />> <br />> A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were celebrating <br />> their <br />> <br />> 40th wedding anniversary. On their special day a good <br />> fairy came to <br />> <br />> them and said that because they had been such a devoted <br />> couple she <br />> <br />> would grant each of them a very special wish. <br />> <br />> The wife wished for a trip around the world with her <br />> husband. <br />> <br />> Whoosh! Immediately she had airline/cruise tickets in her hands. <br />> <br />> The man wished for a female companion 30 years younger... <br />> <br />> Whoosh...immediately he turned ninety!!! <br />> <br />> Gotta love that fairy! __________________ <br />> <br />> AND THE BEST ONE YET... <br />> <br />> A WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST: * She's sitting at the table with her <br />> gourmet coffee. * Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box. * Her <br />> daughter is on the cover of Business Week. * Her boyfriend is on the <br />> cover of Playgirl. * And her husband is on the back of the milk carton. <br /><br />Taz
<br />> <br />> And they say blondes are dumb... _______________________ <br />> <br />> A couple is lying in bed.. The man says, <br />> <br />> "I am going to make you the happiest woman in the world" <br />> <br />> The woman says, "I'll miss you..." <br />> <br />> _______________________ <br />> <br />> "It's just too hot to wear clothes today," Jack says as he <br />> <br />> stepped out of the shower, "honey, <br />> <br />> what do you think the neighbors would think if I mowed the <br />> lawn <br />> <br />> like this?" <br />> <br />> "Probably that I married you for your money," she replied. <br />> _______________________ <br />> <br />> He said - Since I first laid eyes on you, I have wanted to <br />> make <br />> <br />> love to you really badly. <br />> <br />> She said - Well, you succeeded. <br />> <br />> ______________________ <br />> <br />> He said - Shall we try swapping positions tonight? <br />> <br />> She said - That's a good idea... you stand by the ironing <br />> board <br />> <br />> while I sit on the sofa and fart. _______________________ <br />> <br />> He said - What have you been doing with all the grocery <br />> money I <br />> <br />> gave you? <br />> <br />> She said - Turn sideways and look in the mirror <br />> ______________________ Q: <br />> What do you call an intelligent, good looking, <br />> sensitive man? A: A rumor _______________________ <br />> <br />> A man and his wife, now in their 60's, were celebrating <br />> their <br />> <br />> 40th wedding anniversary. On their special day a good <br />> fairy came to <br />> <br />> them and said that because they had been such a devoted <br />> couple she <br />> <br />> would grant each of them a very special wish. <br />> <br />> The wife wished for a trip around the world with her <br />> husband. <br />> <br />> Whoosh! Immediately she had airline/cruise tickets in her hands. <br />> <br />> The man wished for a female companion 30 years younger... <br />> <br />> Whoosh...immediately he turned ninety!!! <br />> <br />> Gotta love that fairy! __________________ <br />> <br />> AND THE BEST ONE YET... <br />> <br />> A WOMAN'S PERFECT BREAKFAST: * She's sitting at the table with her <br />> gourmet coffee. * Her son is on the cover of the Wheaties box. * Her <br />> daughter is on the cover of Business Week. * Her boyfriend is on the <br />> cover of Playgirl. * And her husband is on the back of the milk carton. <br /><br />Taz
