Advice - gf's sis post stroke care

ezbtr

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Happened July last year, a few surgeries, has feeding tube, can understand all but no talking, much limb movement (some arm ) she is a UCSF employee, good bennies, receives $3000 a month, I suppose could live a long time, in N. CA. Oakland, her hubby is a dirtbag, wants the $ as well as he got a car from go fund me stuff, would her bennies from CA work out of state or country? Were just trying to figure out whats best for here - she had JUST turned 50, was in good physical shape etc, Thanks guys
 

GA_Boater

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The best thing to do is to contact the people paying her the benefits. And have her think about dumping her leech hubby.
 

ezbtr

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The best thing to do is to contact the people paying her the benefits. And have her think about dumping her leech hubby.
She cant talk - yet, I told gf to get her niece to yes and no blink, on facetime, belieive me if i had to chat with him, we'd be fishing. But thanks - thinking she needs some type of attorney, this is out of my experience level
 

aspeck

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Unfortunately in a case like this, husband trumps sister. The only way you can change that is through a court action and you are going to have to prove that he is incompetent or is defrauding her. I am no attorney, but I did stay at a Holiday in the end of last month.
 

dingbat

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Unfortunately in a case like this, husband trumps sister. The only way you can change that is through a court action and you are going to have to prove that he is incompetent or is defrauding her. I am no attorney, but I did stay at a Holiday in the end of last month.

Agree. It's going to take a whole lot more than a link and a nod on video if he has Power of Attorney or named as the legal benefactor of her benefits package.
 

Old Ironmaker

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Ah man that's a tough one. It reminds us all to change beneficiaries, power of attorney etc. as soon as a separation between 2 people happens. It's always easy to change it back if things work out. A acquaintance took care of his girlfriend for years after she became totally incapacitated after a car wreck, 15 long hard years. Practically build her a home himself. She passed and her chidren that didn't even see her when she was dying in the hospital or for the next 15 years got her life insurance and the home. He ended up with thank you stupid.
 

Old Ironmaker

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He actually tried to take matters into his own hands if you know what I mean and ended up doing time for it.
 

aspeck

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I deal with this with the fire department and beneficiaries. As soon as I know someone is separated or divorcing I encourage them to change their beneficiaries. There was a fireman that we use as a case study/reminder that was separated from his wife for about 3 years. On year #2 he an his GIRLFRIEND bought a house (in his name). Year #3 he decided it was time to finalize the divorce and marry the girlfriend. The wedding was set for the weekend and he was signing the final divorce decree on Friday. On Thursday he was killed in a line of duty incident. He WIFE was able to bar the girlfriend from the funeral and the WIFE received the state and federal payment (approximately $1 mil total) as beneficiary for the LODD. The girlfriend tried to fight it, but she had nothing to go by because he was still legally married to the "ex" and he had never changed the beneficiary forms.
 

Old Ironmaker

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aspeck. I have heard that story too many times. It's sad. Many men tend to take care of all the people around them and not themselves.
 
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