Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

[wildmaninal]

Before I start I just want to say I was really hesitant on posting this lol but I would like some of your thoughts of how much things have changed, what was your "famous pick up line" (just for fun), input, ideas, and suggestions (on a dating site for example). The kind of mess I'm talking about (only in Alabama check this out>) I'll give you an example: a 15 year old local girl ended up pregnant by an 18 year old man who wasn't prosecuted, here she is still in high school and now has a baby. The parents of the girl are going to let them get married.

I've been out of the dating seen for 6 years or so. I really thought about getting back out and trying it again I'm not getting any younger. But everything seems to of gone to online dating that requires you to pay (outrageous prices). I'm not saying that I can't find a girl just by going to a store for example and asking her out. There just seems like there isn't enough fish in the sea around my part a town. Some of these girls are lets face it way to open and some just want to jump right in so to speak. What's a man to do?

I noticed allot of these girl's preferences now a days aren't exactly like they use to be, and I'm not going to get into details on the preferences. I was raised in the country, proper manners was a must, don't talk back to your mother or father, and you got a good but whooping when you did wrong. I also was raised to follow the bibles ways in the dating area, I'll put it that way for the "preferences". To make matters worse my x-girlfriend moved back to the area (just a street over not far enough away) and she keeps getting thrown up in my face even by my own relatives. They aren't pushing me to date her again but they ignore the fact that I don't want her around me. Why can't they just leave well enough alone. I've cursed Yahoo.com out in the past when they started charging for e-mail services on there personals web site, got kicked off of that site. Simple enough I just started a new user name lol. In a nut shell dating doesn't seem like dating anymore, more like commitment, they just want to jump right in. Leave it to me to start a thread like this . What are your thoughts in general in this subject or subjects at hand?

 

[tashasdaddy]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

i divorced in 1981, been single since, and am happily single. i have a female roommate, but no commitment. as is say about my boats, and dog, they were here first and will be later.

 

[SpinnerBait_Nut]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

Sorry, can't help you any. Been happy with what I got for almost 36 years this coming Feburary.
Yea, no such thing as "dating" anymore from what I can see.
It's "you and me" forever and don't "you dare look at anyone else".

 

[gonefishie]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

Well, that depends on what you want out of the "date", if you're just looking for a good time then don't always try to pick out the perfect girl. Get together once, twice or several times and then move on. The problem with everybody is that they look for the perfect mate but a perfect mate mean commitment. I don't think time has anything to do with it. It's the female insecurity thing. Woman feel insecure all the time, even the most gorgeous ones, there always something wrong with them, according to them of course. There are those out there that just want to have fun but the majority will want to chain you up once they get a hold of you for fear of not being able to get another man. Ladyfish, correct me if I'm wrong on this.

 

[aspeck]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

Been married for almost 8 years now - with the perfect girl! My values are a lot like yours. So we did not worry about dating. We were friends. Became best friends. Did things together at the church and in groups, but never alone. After many years of being friends, I realized how beautiful and wonderful she was ... first time we held hands was on our first "alone" date - when I asked her to marry me (and she said yes). First time we kissed was after we said "I do."

We wanted to make sure we were friends and could remain that way for the rest of our lives without the physical stuff getting in the way. She is still my BEST friend - and the most wonderful wife in the world.

So, my suggestion would be to not worry about the dating scene - that is just crazy. But develop friendships. That is what lasts in the end anyway.

Just my $0.02.

 

[Caveman Charlie]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

I have been out of the dating scene for 15 years. I too decided to get back into it this winter. I'm tired of always doing things alone. Besides, this country is not not set up for people doing things alone. Everyone gives you funny of dirty looks. I don't think I'm going to have any luck again but, I'm giving it another try. The problem is women don't know what they want. They say they want one thing but, then they go out and marry someone who is totally different. In my area the men who are the "abusers" get the most women. And, I'm not like that so I'm out of luck.

Try pleantyoffish it's a free dating web site.

 

[wildmaninal]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

i divorced in 1981, been single since, and am happily single. i have a female roommate, but no commitment. as is say about my boats, and dog, they were here first and will be later.

I personally don't see how you have made it that long TD for real. You haven't had the urge to try and find a date? Of course you must have Kids, sorry couldn't recall. The boats must be your true love or passion .

Yea, no such thing as "dating" anymore from what I can see. It's "you and me" forever and don't "you dare look at anyone else".

I feel like I still agree with that.

Well, that depends on what you want out of the "date", if you're just looking for a good time then don't always try to pick out the perfect girl. Get together once, twice or several times and then move on. The problem with everybody is that they look for the perfect mate but a perfect mate mean commitment. I don't think time has anything to do with it. It's the female insecurity thing. Woman feel insecure all the time, even the most gorgeous ones, there always something wrong with them, according to them of course. There are those out there that just want to have fun but the majority will want to chain you up once they get a hold of you for fear of not being able to get another man. Ladyfish, correct me if I'm wrong on this.

I defiantly don't want a woman that has kids already, been there 2 different times 2 different women in the past. Don't want a woman that has been married, or married and separated, been there also stupid stupid me, even though the one left the man for good. I look at it this way I don't want a dog ugly girl (got to put a paper sack over her head) might look like the elephant woman , but she doesn't half to be gorgeous on the outside to be attractive. It's what is on the inside that makes it or breaks it to me, how intelligent, how communicative is she, what goals she has in life, (in my case) does she have kids, and so on so on.

Been married for almost 8 years now - with the perfect girl! My values are a lot like yours. So we did not worry about dating.
So, my suggestion would be to not worry about the dating scene - that is just crazy. But develop friendships. That is what lasts in the end anyway.

I thought I had that at one time the one girl before the last girl I was dating. I'm truly glad it worked out for you Aspect. You may have a point there.

I have been out of the dating scene for 15 years. I too decided to get back into it this winter. I'm tired of always doing things alone. Besides, this country is not not set up for people doing things alone. Everyone gives you funny of dirty looks. I don't think I'm going to have any luck again but, I'm giving it another try. The problem is women don't know what they want. They say they want one thing but, then they go out and marry someone who is totally different. In my area the men who are the "abusers" get the most women. And, I'm not like that so I'm out of luck.
Try pleantyoffish it's a free dating web site.

I hear ya Caveman, that's the way I feel I am tired of doing things all alone. I agree with nearly all that you said, except I'm not going to agree with when you said "I don't think I'm going to have any luck again". Most of y'all out there half to have more to offer a girl then me, I've been in a tight spot for a little while now. I'll half to try that website.

Right now I'm in a hole seems familiar because the last girl I was dating a few years ago put me in the hole big time and it took me a while to get out of that one, crud I don't know if I'll ever fully recover from that mess. I know you got some air head girls (not all girl are air head) that want the physically fit man, some want the guys who's got the money in the bank, it goes on and on. A woman is going to really half to understand my situation, my physical condition (mainly my fused ankle), and a few more things, I feel like they won't consider me once they find out they might have a heap of junk sittiing in front of them lol. Thanks for chiming in so far, y'all keep em coming.

 

[Haut Medoc]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

The problem I see here is high expectations......
I can understand the no kids thing, but I will go out on a limb here & say that if a woman has not been married or had kids by 35, she is a head case or cannot have children.....
I think you are limiting yourself to unrealistic goals......
A little flexability in your standards can go a long way.....
Without knowing how old ya are, why not consider dating women who have older teenage kids?.......
By then they are independent & have their own friends & ya don't see 'em anyway....
My .02........​

 

[PW2]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

Get a dog, preferably a very friendly dog, like a Golden Retriever.

Take walks. You can virtually talk to anyone you wish to when they are bending down to pet your dog. It may not work with women who hate dogs, but why would you want to bother with them anyway.

But heck, if it fails you'll always have the dog, and that's not the worst thing that can happen.

I always used to tell friends a dog was better than a wife. She'll be happy to see you, even if you are late. And if the dog gets too far out of line, you can always shoot her without getting into too much trouble.

 

[Haut Medoc]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

Good advice.......^^^^^^
Get a puppy, they are a chick magnet......
Of course in Seattle we have doggy parks, but when we got a puppy at the beginning of the summer....
Well, let me just say that I was almost regrettin' that I was not single.....​

 

[gonefishie]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

Yeah, I think you're looking for a girlfriend, not just a date. She don't have to be your girlfriend to do stuff with you. Like Haut said, back off on the expectation a little.

 

[JRJ]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

Reminds me of an old Letterman joke, "I can't even get my leaves blown." Sorry for the interruption.

 

[RubberFrog]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

Wait... haut and pw2 giving good advice that I agree with?

My head hurts....

 

[wildmaninal]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

I thought about the puppy idea in the past. I have three dogs in a since (really turned into my fathers dogs), one lab mixed, then a german shepard wanna be lol, then a female mutt. I have thought about getting a Jack Russel, lap dog, my uncle has one. My brother ended up getting him a Jack after seeing my uncles dog and how friendly it was. He's married and has 2kids. Plus I could carry the Jack Russel around with me in the truck easier then carrying the others even though they like to ride.

I hear y'all, I don't know if it's my expectations or low self esteem . Here I know in one post basically somebody mentioned girls self esteem or something along the lines of it, heck I might be the problem still. LOL JRJ, but I'm not out just to get the leaves blown.

 

[PW2]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

Good advice.......^^^^^^
Get a puppy, they are a chick magnet......
Of course in Seattle we have doggy parks, but when we got a puppy at the beginning of the summer....
Well, let me just say that I was almost regrettin' that I was not single.....​

Man, you would not believe all the nice people of the female persuasion I met in Marymoor Park--they have a "no-leash voice control" area along the Sammamish Slough Great place for a walk, the dog loved it and it had lots of "fringe benefits"

 

[Gary H NC]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

I went thru the online dating before.I found out the womens expectations are very high.I used to get a kick out of reading the profiles.About everyone of them was looking for "the perfect man"....Geeze! give me a break!
You would be surprised how many of them wanted to know the status of my bank account.Some would talk back and forth then just vanish.
I did go out with one very hot blonde for a few weeks then found out she was married and her hubby was in prison!I got out of that one fast!
The one i'm with now i met at the park....walking my dog...It does work sometimes... Thats why i was at the park...lol

 

[Jerico]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

I had been married 19+ years when she passed away from a heart attack in '99. Out of boredom I signed up on a dating site a year later. We've been married 6 years now and going strong. Back then Internet dating wasn't as acceptable as it is now, but it worked for us.

 

[MikDee]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

I went thru the online dating before.I found out the womens expectations are very high.I used to get a kick out of reading the profiles.About everyone of them was looking for "the perfect man"....Geeze! give me a break!
You would be surprised how many of them wanted to know the status of my bank account.Some would talk back and forth then just vanish.

I feel your pain! I got divorced 14yrs ago at 48, an old man on the dating scene, the bar circuit didn't work for me, and as Gary said, I found online ads with obscene ads from guys, usually describing their genital size, and sites chock full of women looking for the "impossible dream", Talk about high expectations! and not wanting to settle for anything less, it's a joke, but not very funny. I thought it was pathetic. These same women probably broke up with a loser or "bad boy", chances are they'll end up with another loser, as much as they proclaim they want the perfect man, and the pattern repeats itself. That leaves the average good guy, dateless. They'd rather put you down, over any small defects, or if they think you're boring, drop you, then go date a guy that's exciting, then turns out to be "dangerously exciting" or abusive, then it's back to putting up an "untouchable" dating site ad, and wonder why there's no good guys out there?! Hello, wake up ladies, expand your horizons a bit!

Maybe you should get a motorcycle, and look dangerous (but really not be),,,lol,,, Hey sometimes it works, women usually swoon over guys with bikes.

Me, I got lucky, finally thru yahoo online yrs ago, but I also dated long distance out of my area Long Island (filled with female sharks). Good Luck and Hang in there, Mike

 

[Ezrider_92356]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

the internet is a good way to talk to new people in a way that you feel comfortable as far as that goes its a good way to meet women other than that its useless

 

[wildmaninal]

Re: Dating in the 21st century doesn't it blow

Maybe you should get a motorcycle, and look dangerous (but really not be),,,lol,,, Hey sometimes it works, women usually swoon over guys with bikes.

Done shaved off my handle bar mustache yesterday I'm not lying, darn it . I guess I'm going in the wrong direction. I sold my 69 Honda cb350, probably wouldn't be a big enough bike for the bad boy seen lol, need a Harley. I had one chick checking me out at walmart she was a door greeter (at least she had a job), but I couldn't tell if she was checking me out because she thought I was a thief or what. This was during the time I had the handle bar mustache. My mother that was with me is the main one that noticed she was checking me out. But I can't go to job interviews and have a handle bar mustache. I have had read girls profiles that mentioned that they are just out looking for some, I'll let you figure out what the "some" is.

Get this mess, I just deleted a picture of a friends boat off of my phone by accident that I was fixing to post on Craigs list, this sucks, don't know if I'll be able to recover it. I think I just found the picture thank the lord above.