Declining help at the dock

[Blue Skies 3607]

Hello all,

This is just driving me nuts and I just had it happen again tonight and I just don't know how to handle it. I know I?m not the only one this has happened to?.how have you handled it?

I have a one of the larger boats in the marina at 20 some thousand pounds and consider myself a pretty competent and experienced captain. I?m a big user of spring lines to get my boat both onto and off of the dock.

I have my home dock lines set perfectly so my wife or whoever my guest might be, with very little direction, need only take a single spring line off of a very well marked hook on the dock and place it over a well marked cleat.

From there I can put the boat into and against the dock with that one line and my engines by myself pretty much regardless of the wind direction and velocity.....short of a hurricane?.from there I can attach the rest of the lines and shut down.

As I come down the harbor toward the dock everyone seems to come running to the ?rescue? as if I am a bumbling idiot that is about to wipe out every boat in the marina or ?obviously this big boat is gonna need a lot of help getting in the dock so we better go help um?. Now I am well aware they are just very well intentioned and really are just trying to help BUT??.

When I turn into the dock, there they are, standing there with every dock line already in their hands ready to put them somewhere on my boat, leaving the one and only line I really need God knows where and four or five people asking my deck hand where they all go?.at this point I have no idea who has what line where, let alone my wife or worse yet a fairly uneducated guest that I told ?all you have to do is take this one line off the dock and put it here and I?ll do the rest?, trying to answer them.

Tonight I came in after a beautiful night cruise with a relatively light wind blowing me off the dock?..I actually had an experienced deck hand on as well as our wives. Then there they were 4 people hooking up lines to the wrong cleats, trying to pull, push and shove this 20K lb boat, in the dark onto the dock.

I ended up drifting off the dock with lines attached in the wrong places and because of the improper/late placement of the one spring line I really needed, I kind of did look like that bumbling idiot.

But what I really am is concerned someone is going to get hurt or my boat is going to end up in the rocks of the pier because I can?t see where everyone is and I?m not sure that the lines are where they need to be so I?m reluctant to work the boat against lines.

I don?t want to hurt people?s feelings that are simply trying to help and at some point who knows, maybe I?ll really need help. I?m concerned that if I have p***ed them off by telling them to please leave my lines alone, they would think I?m the a**hole and never offer to help or God forbid, give me a beer again.

These are my dock neighbors up and down the pier and I understand they are trying to be helpful but I really don?t want it unless I ask for it.

Don?t get me wrong, I?m all about going and helping a fellow boater at his dock if it seems sketchy. I find the less experienced boaters need it and have no idea about how to use spring lines to get on or off of their dock. Many don?t need to use lines because they have light boats and can or choose to drag them onto the dock by hand. Regardless, I simply stand there and ask what if any help they need before I do anything. Any suggestions of how to delicately get that same respect would be appreciated.

 

[marcoalza]

Re: Declining help at the dock

Interesting my friend, Can't you just say to these guys, "It's OK we've got it, Watch and learn"

Seriously, are these always the same people that are offering to bungle things for you?

I'm very interested to hear how others would deal with this as I have a similar issue when I have everything under control.
I do use the line "It's OK we've got it" and even "Watch and learn" but always mumbling that bit under my breath:facepalm:

 

[tpenfield]

Re: Declining help at the dock

I'm not a big fan of 'helpers' unless I really need it. . . . all to often when I throw someone on the dock a line when they have offered to help, they go about securing the line as if it is their first time doing it.

As far as your crew helping . . . probably best you let them do their helping thing as best they can, let them get off the boat, then re-secure things the way you like it.

 

[Home Cookin']

Re: Declining help at the dock

if they are your dock neighbors, look for a chance to tell them in a friendly way that the extra help makes it hard on you since you have a system and would rather work with just one person. explain your methods.

As for the others, try the same explanation--"thanks but I have a system--please put that line back where it was."

 

[salty87]

Re: Declining help at the dock

maybe they're all hoping to get a ride someday.

'thanks guys, i appreciate the offer but it's under control. let me show you how a spring line works.'

 

[Fireman431]

Re: Declining help at the dock

I feel your pain.....

 

[25thmustang]

Re: Declining help at the dock

I can say I haven't had this issue. I've never seen more than one or two guys giving a hand, and they only stand by in case a line is tossed to them. Maybe it's worth a talk if you know them personally?

 

[the vision]

Re: Declining help at the dock

Maybe you could put tags on your dock lines. (PLEASE DO NOT TOUCH).

 

[roscoe]

Re: Declining help at the dock

I have seen this happen, and experienced it. It really is a tough/delicate
situation. Kind of hard to tell them to not help, when they are there ready to help, lines in hand, before you get within 100 yards of your slip.


I would perhaps start with a small "apologetic" note, posted near my dock lines. Or deliver a copy to the frequent offender(s).


To all my friends and fellow boaters, your kind offers to help with docking my boats are appreciated. I'm not meaning to offend, but under most circumstances, we need no assistance. Extra dock hands have a way of raising my stress level, and distract me from my very methodical procedure. As you know, this boat is large and very heavy, and I worry about you being injured, so much so, that I can't concentrate on my task at hand.

There may come a day when I will need your help, and I will certainly help you if you ask, thats what we do.
But for now, please refrain from helping.

Stop by for a cold drink and a chat anytime.
Your dock mate, Blue Skies.

 

[NYBo]

Re: Declining help at the dock

Welcome to iboats!

People on the dock are picking up your mooring lines without permission? Poor form, even if well-intentioned. Perhaps a chat with the manager of the marina is in order

 

[jayhanig]

Re: Declining help at the dock

if they are your dock neighbors, look for a chance to tell them in a friendly way that the extra help makes it hard on you since you have a system and would rather work with just one person. explain your methods.

As for the others, try the same explanation--"thanks but I have a system--please put that line back where it was."

I like this idea best. Something else you might consider doing is making all of your dock lines one color except for that one spring line you need. Then you could just ask them to throw that one differently colored line. Just a thought...

 

[Thalasso]

Re: Declining help at the dock

Hello all,

This is just driving me nuts and I just had it happen again tonight and I just don't know how to handle it. I know I’m not the only one this has happened to….how have you handled it?

I have a one of the larger boats in the marina at 20 some thousand pounds and consider myself a pretty competent and experienced captain. I’m a big user of spring lines to get my boat both onto and off of the dock.

I have my home dock lines set perfectly so my wife or whoever my guest might be, with very little direction, need only take a single spring line off of a very well marked hook on the dock and place it over a well marked cleat.

From there I can put the boat into and against the dock with that one line and my engines by myself pretty much regardless of the wind direction and velocity.....short of a hurricane….from there I can attach the rest of the lines and shut down.

As I come down the harbor toward the dock everyone seems to come running to the “rescue” as if I am a bumbling idiot that is about to wipe out every boat in the marina or “obviously this big boat is gonna need a lot of help getting in the dock so we better go help um”. Now I am well aware they are just very well intentioned and really are just trying to help BUT…….

When I turn into the dock, there they are, standing there with every dock line already in their hands ready to put them somewhere on my boat, leaving the one and only line I really need God knows where and four or five people asking my deck hand where they all go….at this point I have no idea who has what line where, let alone my wife or worse yet a fairly uneducated guest that I told “all you have to do is take this one line off the dock and put it here and I’ll do the rest”, trying to answer them.

Tonight I came in after a beautiful night cruise with a relatively light wind blowing me off the dock…..I actually had an experienced deck hand on as well as our wives. Then there they were 4 people hooking up lines to the wrong cleats, trying to pull, push and shove this 20K lb boat, in the dark onto the dock.

I ended up drifting off the dock with lines attached in the wrong places and because of the improper/late placement of the one spring line I really needed, I kind of did look like that bumbling idiot.

But what I really am is concerned someone is going to get hurt or my boat is going to end up in the rocks of the pier because I can’t see where everyone is and I’m not sure that the lines are where they need to be so I’m reluctant to work the boat against lines.

I don’t want to hurt people’s feelings that are simply trying to help and at some point who knows, maybe I’ll really need help. I’m concerned that if I have p***ed them off by telling them to please leave my lines alone, they would think I’m the a**hole and never offer to help or God forbid, give me a beer again.

These are my dock neighbors up and down the pier and I understand they are trying to be helpful but I really don’t want it unless I ask for it.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m all about going and helping a fellow boater at his dock if it seems sketchy. I find the less experienced boaters need it and have no idea about how to use spring lines to get on or off of their dock. Many don’t need to use lines because they have light boats and can or choose to drag them onto the dock by hand. Regardless, I simply stand there and ask what if any help they need before I do anything. Any suggestions of how to delicately get that same respect would be appreciated.

I think you should accept the fact that all there doing is trying to help you. Maybe they don't know your abilities. On the other hand at some point and it will happen you might need a little hand and they might say screw you because you know it all.Accept it for what it is and secure your lines the why you want after it's all over.Don't be so proud to think you don't need help. It could come back to bite you.

 

[ricohman]

Re: Declining help at the dock

I take all the help I can get. Our local launch doesn't even have cleats on the dock to tie to.....

 

[Chip Chester]

Re: Declining help at the dock

Got a hailing/PA speaker? It would allow you to make your request to the crowd in a low, calm voice, without yelling. Just ask them to stand clear, not disturb the lines, and allow you and your crew to take responsibility for your vessel. They'll never take the time to read the note suggested. If you can, hold back from the dock until they've put down the lines and stepped back.

Color-coded lines make a lot of sense, too.

The first time someone goes to "help" by leaning into a push on the hull, at the same time you make that hull back away smartly, they go in the drink, between your boat and the dock. Maybe 'splain that to 'em.

 

[CaptainKickback]

Re: Declining help at the dock

I have two alternatives for you.

1) When you get the opportunity, engage these people in casual conversation, but lead the conversation into the "cool way you dock your boat". Explain what you do and how well it works. If they have any brains, you shouldn't even have to say "don't touch my lines", and, they won't even know that's what your telling them to do.

2) Since you have a lot of experience, practice alternative ways to dock your boat where you are controlling it, regardless of what lines they are holding in their hands. Or at least something easily explainable to one person on the dock.

Given the weight of your boat, I take it the boat is about 40', so I assume you are backing into your slip and I assume you have two engines. My goal would be to pick up the dockside stern line. Instruct you crew to identify the person holding that line and have them throw it to them. Or have a line hooked to the boat they throw to the on-dock person, with the instruction to cleat it immediately.

If the wind and current are going to take you onto the dock, that's easy. But if the opposite, hopefully you are backing into the wind and current, steering with the engines only, and aiming your stern corner at the outer edge of the dock, beginning to straightening up as you get there. As you are backing, you are straightening the rest of the way, but your engines are still holding you against the wind and current. You should have well enough time to get the stern line cleated.

My main point is, if your are in control of the boat, you won't have to worry about the helpers on the dock.

Let me know if you want more details on this backing method.

Sea ya...

 

[26aftcab454]

Re: Declining help at the dock

hey- throw me a line!!!

 

[TilliamWe]

Re: Declining help at the dock

Fairly good ideas so far, so let me ask a question. Have you had a difficult time or two, in front of an audience? Meaning, have they only seen you on your least successful days, and think you really do need help? If so, on a day where the wind is blowing favorably, and you know you can do it all by yourself, just do it all by yourself. Instruct you crew to not even take any lines from the guys on the dock. Then when you have it int he slip, grab lines and attach them. The helpers should realize then, "wow, he really can dock it solo."

Have your deckhands say something like, "hang on fellas, lets see if Capt. Blue Skies can do this without any help?"

 

[generator12]

Re: Declining help at the dock

+1 with Nybo. "I know you're well-intentioned, but please get the hell out of the way. I'm trying to dock my boat."

They're probably trying to satisfy themselves that they "helped someone" that day. We all have that tendency, but it often gets in the way.

 

[25thmustang]

Re: Declining help at the dock

Come to think of my own self, I'm the first person to run over and help with a boat coming into a slip. I hope I'm not looked at as a problem, as I make sure to take any direction given from the captain. Usually a line is tossed and I use it to keep the boat side to side in the slip, while he backs it down (if there's a wind or current).

 

[Scott Danforth]

Re: Declining help at the dock

just my observation based on the comments and what I see at the marinas:

Human nature is generally to help. however as the OP has mentioned, this is resulting in issues when the process is changed.

are the people fellow marina neighbors, or random people?

if it is the same group of people, they can be taught/trained. have one individual that you know arrive at the marina and take charge. have them yell to you as your pulling in and ask "may I assist, and which line would you like" people will note that things run smoothly and commit it to memory. if this is repeated a few times, memory becomes habit. unfortunately bad habits are hard to break prior to instilling good habits.

now, on to random people at the dock.

I like the idea of different colored lines that Jay mentioned. however if they are all the same length, then people will still get them confused - however the different color makes it easy to yell - "the blue line first"

I myself am a fan of custom tailored lines, especially with nylon labels. My friend on his 37' Ketch has custom length dock lines that he, his girlfriend or anyone on board can snag with a boaters hook, or be handed from the dock. with a single loop, simply drop over the cleat and done - move on to the next line. each line has his boat name on it, and the bow lines read "bow cleat", the aft lines read "aft cleat" and spring lines read "center cleat".