how can I get around privacy law?

[arboldt]

Re: how can I get around privacy law?

Hang in there, Bandit.

Your situation sounds quite similar to that of our son and his daughter several years ago. Our granddaughter was with he birth mother one weekend, and the mother and her BF left for 30-45 minutes, leaving a 7 year old girl (our granddaughter) in charge of 4 younger half-siblings. This constituted child endangerment. I had been tipped off that this might happen, so I sat across a parking lot and took photos of mom & BF leaving, noting times, etc. Child Protective Services and the police were notified, but nothing happened. I wrote a letter to CPS detailing the events, but nothing happened.

A week later, our granddaughter had her regular session with her counsellor, and told him that she was scared because she didn't know what to do if there was a problem. That counsellor was legally required to report it to CPS, and in less than a week our son had legal ex parte (emergency) custody, and mom was under investigation to have all parental rights revoked for all her kids, etc.

*You* will be ignored. However, coach *your son* to call 911 if he feels threatened or in danger. Have *him* ask for help from a school guidance counsellor. If there's nothing to eat, *he* must call Child Protective Services, not you. This may be a lot to ask of a child, but at 10 years old its a responsibility he can take *if* he truly feels endangered or abused. It's also probably the only way to spark action from the bureaucracy.

 

[bandit86]

Re: how can I get around privacy law?

for years his mother told him whatever was wrong was his fault. poor kid was terrified to talk about home, now that he did he was told he'll never see me again. he had this threat thrown at him by his mother all the time, it's gonna take a lot of talking to get him to call 911, but that was my next plan, though I doubt she'll let me see him this weekend

 

[starsnstripers]

Re: how can I get around privacy law?

I dont know about up there but when you finally get in court and maybe suggest it to your lawyer is that you want a gaurdian adlitumn apointed to the case. They are in the position to iterview child parents schools etc. and report to the court whats in the best interest of the child. Good luck with this i've been through a nightmare with my ex and kids. She moved to Fla. with them was court ordered to give me address and phone # Havent heard a WORD!!!!!!!! Sad a** court system, They didn't even tell her to do it certified for proof. So if we ever go to court again she'll do like last time and lie saying that i had access to my children when she dissapeard for two years. I'm not even going there. It about put me in my grave... anyway i feel for ya hang in there.

 

[SgtMaj]

Re: how can I get around privacy law?

Ok, first of all, go to the teacher on a personal level and level with her. Ask her if she will be willing to testify for you, and then talk to your lawyer, have him get an afadavit from the teacher and the principal (after obtaining an afadavit from the teacher and filing suit, the principal will be obliged to also sign an afadavit and/or testify on your behalf). When you file suit, attach DHS/CPS to the suit (meaning sue them as well, for sitting on their butts). This wipes out any legal shield they may have hidden behind and every piece of evidence they have gathered, becomes admissable.

Another good thing to do is to go down to the local sheriffs dept. and make a friend. If you can, get him or her to look into the matter. Often times a search warrant executed by the sheriffs dept. can turn up an unhealthy living environment. Oh, and a surefire way to get them to execute a search warrant, is if your son mentioned something about his mother using and selling drugs out of the home... (not that I'm suggesting you lie... *wink* *wink*)

 

[PW2]

Re: how can I get around privacy law?

Nothing is infallible, but one thing I know for sure is that DSS does *NOT* want to be put in the middle of a custody dispute.

They've seen it all (as have judges) so tread very lightly. Try to deal with specific observable behaviors and avoid vague generalities and be as dispassionate as possible.

Good Luck

 

[bandit86]

Re: how can I get around privacy law?

define be dispassionate, my vocabulary is not the grearest

after not hearing form him in a couple days, I got an email form my son, at 1:27 pm when he should have been in school, that he doesnt want to live with me and wants all his stuff

I called the local police department, asked them to go and check on him, now just playing the waiting game

 

[Nandy]

Re: how can I get around privacy law?

dispassionate: not influenced by strong feeling; especially : not affected by personal or emotional involvement.

Your above post sounds like he is under duress or someone else sent the email pretending to be him. Stand your grounds... Praying here for the kid.

 

[jay_merrill]

Re: how can I get around privacy law?

I usually am not a betting man. That said, I might be willing to throw up a few bucks on a bet that it wasn't your son who sent that email. Print it out for your file and forward a copy of the email to your attorney.

 

[suzhol76]

Re: how can I get around privacy law?

I am really praying hard for you and your son! Have faith and hope and keep your head up.
-Suz

 

[SgtMaj]

Re: how can I get around privacy law?

Agreed with above, the email was likely faked by her, and if you find out he was in school on the day that was sent, you've got her by the short hairs. What I mean by that is, she's discredited herself and no judge will be as likely to believe any future testimony she gives. Definately save a couple copies, one to hard drive, burn one on a CD, and print it out (with full headers). You'll need more than just the printout when you go to court as any judge worth his gavel will question wether or not it is authentic.

Oh, your lawyer should also be gunning for her to say that he wrote it durring the deposition. If he gets her to say that in a deposition and it can be proved false, she's really in for it, and you could even press charges for purgery.

Follow up with the cop to see if he'll give you any information (see if he'll let it slip that he was in school). Probably not, but you never know. The police report stating that he was in school is a great piece of evidence.

Most importantly, go talk to your lawyer or find a lawyer if you don't already have a good one (and by good, I mean ruthless) and start filing!

 

[dave11]

Re: how can I get around privacy law?

Jay Merill has excellent advice. My wife's undergraduate major was sociology with social global welfare as a minor. Her masters is in social work. She was also a state expert in domestic violence. Abuse is a big topic in our home. There are some good social workers. Most of them are just there for a paycheck. Push the paperwork through. Get a good agressive proactive attorney. Sgt Major's advice to talk to all parties concerned EVERYDAY is a good one. The squeaky wheel gets the grease. Too many times I have read in the paper that childern were killed by there caretakers, because the social workers didn't want to get involved in a dificult situation. Your child is in a dangerous situation. They are quite likely to hurt him to spite you. To them, he is a pawn not a child.

I hope for a speedy resolution to your situation.