little johnny

oops!

Supreme Mariner
Joined
Oct 18, 2007
Messages
12,932
Little Johnny's at it again.....
A new teacher was trying to make use of her psychology courses. She started her class by saying, 'Everyone who thinks they're stupid, stand up!' After a few seconds, Little Johnny stood up. The teacher said, 'Do you think you're stupid, Little Johnny?' 'No, ma'am, but I hate to see you standing there all by yourself!'

Little Johnny watched, fascinated, as his mother smoothed cold cream on her face. 'Why do you do that, mommy?' he asked. 'To make myself beautiful,' said his mother, who then began removing the cream with a tissue. 'What's the matter?' asked Little Johnny. 'Giving up?'

The math teacher saw that little Johnny wasn't paying attention in class. She called on him and said,
'Johnny! What are 2 and 4 and 28 and 44?' Little Johnny quickly replied, 'NBC, FOX, ESPN and the Cartoon Network!'

Little Johnny's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the 10 most wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person. 'Yes,' said the policeman. 'The detectives want very badly to capture him.' Little Johnny asked, 'Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture ?'

Little Johnny attended a horse auction with his father. He watched as his father moved from horse to horse, running his han ds up and down the horse's legs and rump, and chest. After a few minutes, Johnny asked, 'Dad, why are you doing that?' His father replied, 'Because when I'm buying horses, I have to make sure that they are healthy and in good shape before I buy. Johnny, looking worried, said, 'Dad, I think the UPS guy wants to buy Mom .
 

aspeck

Moderator
Staff member
Joined
May 29, 2003
Messages
19,226
Re: little johnny

Those deserve a ...
:D
:D
:D
:D
and :eek:!
 

ne7800

Lieutenant Junior Grade
Joined
Jul 10, 2008
Messages
1,195
Re: little johnny

oh man i love the little johnny jokes :D
 

Bob_VT

Moderator & Unofficial iBoats Historian
Staff member
Joined
May 19, 2001
Messages
26,077
Re: little johnny

Go Johnny go..... go Johnny go go go..........
 
Joined
Jul 14, 2008
Messages
59
Re: little johnny

Hers my favorite little johnny joke....

Litttle Johnny was sitting in class one day and the teacher was asking all the students what there fathers did for a living, She got the usual responses, lawyer, salesman, doctor etc...

she looked over at Johnny who at the time has his head down looking to avoid the question, She quickly said "what about you Johnny, what does your father do?"

Johnny hesitates, "well, he, he ugh is a gay male stripper, and um sometimes he dances privately in the alley for money too! and ughh"

right there the teacher sidetracks the class and says "ok ok ok thats quite enough, Johnny can i see you in the hall please ?". the teacher says

they leave the class briefly and the teacher gets johnny into the hall, "Johnny, is that what your father really does for a livin?" johnny looks at her very sad and he says " NO" the teacher says " then why would you say those outlandish things?" Johnny looks up and hesitantly says "he really plays for the Chicago Cubs and i didnt want anyone to know"




Yes i am a true Chicago Sox fan, but this is a multi use joke :D
 

Tyme2fish

Commander
Joined
Feb 19, 2002
Messages
2,481
Re: little johnny

Attention. I finally found a picture of Little Johnny. I'm sure you can pick him out in the class photo.
 

Attachments

  • Little Johnny.jpg
    Little Johnny.jpg
    74.1 KB · Views: 0

Limited-Time

Vice Admiral
Joined
Mar 30, 2005
Messages
5,820
Re: little johnny

Attention. I finally found a picture of Little Johnny. I'm sure you can pick him out in the class photo.
Leave to to Little Johnny...........................................................the good old Hawaiian good luck sign.:D:D:D That's my boy..;):)
 

oops!

Supreme Mariner
Joined
Oct 18, 2007
Messages
12,932
Re: little johnny

Attention. I finally found a picture of Little Johnny. I'm sure you can pick him out in the class photo.


little johnny in the front row on the left.....his mother obviously drives him to school :)
 

oops!

Supreme Mariner
Joined
Oct 18, 2007
Messages
12,932
Re: little johnny

double post
 
Last edited:

jay_merrill

Vice Admiral
Joined
Dec 5, 2007
Messages
5,653
Re: little johnny

I know a few Little Johnny jokes too. Unfortunately, none of them are suitable for publication here! :p
 
Top