Lost my Son

Tail_Gunner

Admiral
Joined
Jan 13, 2006
Messages
6,237
Re: Lost my Son

I have three sons i cannot imagine losing one. They say at a time like this it is important to not hate...i do not know just how that is possible. But SS be strong and clear and do your best..time heals.

God's speed for your and your family.
 

colbyt

Master Chief Petty Officer
Joined
Aug 9, 2012
Messages
824
Re: Lost my Son

SS, I am very sorry to hear about this. May you find some peace and closure.
 

GA_Boater

Honorary Moderator Emeritus
Joined
May 24, 2011
Messages
49,038
Re: Lost my Son

SS, I have no words for this kind of sorrow except it is OK to tear up. Rest in peace David. My thoughts, buddy.
 

tpenfield

Moderator
Staff member
Joined
Jul 18, 2011
Messages
18,137
Re: Lost my Son

My thoughts are with you in this time of sorrow.

I hope automotive technology does more to address drinking and driving so these types of things don't happen.
 

rfdfirecaptain

Petty Officer 1st Class
Joined
Aug 17, 2008
Messages
314
Re: Lost my Son

Wow... brings back a lot of fresh memories for me... a month ago last night actually. My family is dealing with an involuntary manslaughter charge here too. We've given it to God because? what else can we do? It was my 21 year old nephew and I loved him just like he was my own son.

We can't undo the accidental and careless act that took my nephew, but in turn we have reached out to the other family and we have accompanied them and their loved one to court for the first 2 appearances. In turn, they don't know what to think. They have never experienced that kind of grace. As Dr. R.T. Kendall says in his book Total Forgiveness, 'You can't give away what you don't have". God has given abundant grace to my family and maybe now we know why, at least in part.

It?s hard to sit in church on Sunday, praising the Lord, proclaiming that God is in control, then walk out the front door and go live what we claim to believe Monday through Saturday, especially when faced with this kind of sudden and tragic situation. However, if you are Christian, you know that God appoints a man to die only once (Hebrews 9:27) and Christians believe that time is predestined.

I have 5 kids, four boys and one girl ages 9 ? 17. I've been a professional firefighter for over 26 years and I've seen it all. Lives are taken every day by good people who make poor choices and? "But by the grace of God, there go I". I've committed my share of share of wrongs too. I strongly encourage you to go to the person whose careless act took your son?s life. Until you have wrapped your arms around someone who has taken something so dear to you... told them you forgive them and that you love them... you will never know what it feels like to be liberated from the worst pain imaginable. Like my family, what else can you do that will lift you, the guilty party and the innocent members of the other family? Of course there will always be a wound that may fade into a scar, but your act of grace can do a lot to stop the hemorrhaging. When 2 families and 1 tragedy collide, you will be amazed at how God will bless YOU for sharing something that only comes from God? the love of ?grace?.

It appears to me that you are adjusting to this ?new normal? about like we are. Some are days better than others. I pray that God will use you in a mighty way to reach out to the other hurting family and be the instrument that illustrates how everything does work together for greater good and God?s glory. If you ever want to talk I would be willing to lend an ear. If so, send me a private message with your phone number.

Keith
 

Fishin Magician

Petty Officer 2nd Class
Joined
Aug 7, 2012
Messages
123
Re: Lost my Son

snapped the thread...didn't know what I was getting in to................sorry for your loss......

fm
 

Tail_Gunner

Admiral
Joined
Jan 13, 2006
Messages
6,237
Re: Lost my Son

Wow... brings back a lot of fresh memories for me... a month ago last night actually. My family is dealing with an involuntary manslaughter charge here too. We've given it to God because? what else can we do? It was my 21 year old nephew and I loved him just like he was my own son.

We can't undo the accidental and careless act that took my nephew, but in turn we have reached out to the other family and we have accompanied them and their loved one to court for the first 2 appearances. In turn, they don't know what to think. They have never experienced that kind of grace. As Dr. R.T. Kendall says in his book Total Forgiveness, 'You can't give away what you don't have". God has given abundant grace to my family and maybe now we know why, at least in part.

It?s hard to sit in church on Sunday, praising the Lord, proclaiming that God is in control, then walk out the front door and go live what we claim to believe Monday through Saturday, especially when faced with this kind of sudden and tragic situation. However, if you are Christian, you know that God appoints a man to die only once (Hebrews 9:27) and Christians believe that time is predestined.

I have 5 kids, four boys and one girl ages 9 ? 17. I've been a professional firefighter for over 26 years and I've seen it all. Lives are taken every day by good people who make poor choices and? "But by the grace of God, there go I". I've committed my share of share of wrongs too. I strongly encourage you to go to the person whose careless act took your son?s life. Until you have wrapped your arms around someone who has taken something so dear to you... told them you forgive them and that you love them... you will never know what it feels like to be liberated from the worst pain imaginable. Like my family, what else can you do that will lift you, the guilty party and the innocent members of the other family? Of course there will always be a wound that may fade into a scar, but your act of grace can do a lot to stop the hemorrhaging. When 2 families and 1 tragedy collide, you will be amazed at how God will bless YOU for sharing something that only comes from God? the love of ?grace?.

It appears to me that you are adjusting to this ?new normal? about like we are. Some are days better than others. I pray that God will use you in a mighty way to reach out to the other hurting family and be the instrument that illustrates how everything does work together for greater good and God?s glory. If you ever want to talk I would be willing to lend an ear. If so, send me a private message with your phone number.

Keith

Our former next door neighbor's son was involved in a dwi death. One year later there shame and guilt has almost destroyed them. They were once proud and full of life i will share this thread with them and the party who's son is deceased.

ThankYou
 

bigdee

Commander
Joined
Jul 27, 2006
Messages
2,667
Re: Lost my Son

I am so sorry, my condolences goes out to you and your family
 
Joined
Mar 27, 2010
Messages
3,008
Re: Lost my Son

My sicnerest condolonces to you and your family during this terrible tragedy.

You are in our thoughts and prayers!

I cannot imagine the grief you are experiencing at this time. :(

Just know we here at Iboats are thinking of you during this difficult time. :(
 

CaptainKickback

Lieutenant Junior Grade
Joined
Jul 23, 2011
Messages
1,060
Re: Lost my Son

Just adding my condolences to the many above. Really sorry to hear such news.

Sea ya...
 

FlaCowboy

Ensign
Joined
Dec 8, 2011
Messages
973
Re: Lost my Son

SS, my condolences to you and your family. Keep the good memories close to your heart to help ease the pain.
 

CharlieB

Vice Admiral
Joined
Apr 10, 2007
Messages
5,617
Re: Lost my Son

Mere words cannot begin to express how I feel for your Family.

I have one Daughter and one Son, I can only try to imagine the loss of either.

I can only Pray you find the strength and Faith to carry on to keep their memory alive.
 

rfdfirecaptain

Petty Officer 1st Class
Joined
Aug 17, 2008
Messages
314
Re: Lost my Son

Our former next door neighbor's son was involved in a dwi death. One year later there shame and guilt has almost destroyed them. They were once proud and full of life i will share this thread with them and the party who's son is deceased.

@Tail_Gunner: Many times my family members have agreed that the other family?s pain is a double portion of what we got. There are surviving victims on both sides and it?s a shame that the guilty party?s family will so often be overlooked. Their world is upended too.

I think most pastors are too hung up on the first two Commandments. 1.Love the Lord thy God and 2.Love thy Neighbor. The common arrangement is that God is love and all love comes from God. Then you hear phrases like ?love makes the world go around?. Too often we forget about forgiveness and that yes, a loving God will send you to Hell. God is a forgiving God of grace and mercy in order to keep us out of Hell. I believe forgiveness is what makes the world go around. If God were not so forgiving would it matter how much he loved us? We all know folks who are loving people, but refuse to forgive and move on in various circumstances. If on a daily basis everyone in the world forgave others first and loved second just imagine how different our world would become.

Even if forgiveness doesn?t come to your former neighbors, they are going to have to put their problems at the foot of the Cross. I?ve had many comforting pats on the back and words whispered in my ear, but my greatest comfort is the times when I cried out to the Lord with hurt and anger. I really let Him know how I felt about it and the Bible?s account of Job?s life and his losses is very similar. Suffering in God?s eyes is commendable (Romans 5:3-5). It?s only during times when I feel like I have suffered that I have felt a super strong presence of God?s Holy Spirit. Encourage them to give this burden to God and I shall pray for peace in their lives. Relief may be just a prayer away for them. After all Jesus said, ?You have not because you have asked not? (James 4:2).
 

Kiwi Phil

Commander
Joined
Jun 23, 2003
Messages
2,182
Re: Lost my Son

That is terrible SS.
I am unsure what to say, so please accept my sincere condolences.
Cheers
Phillip
 

waterinthefuel

Commander
Joined
Nov 15, 2003
Messages
2,728
Re: Lost my Son

Dude OMG I am so sorry. This hits close to home, I consider you a friend on this forum we've been on here so long together. Dude I wouldn't be able to compose a thread on a boating forum if it had happened to me so you already are showing me you're stronger than I could ever be.
 
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