R Wee Gittin Mor Dummer, Oar R Thaa?

S

singerjr

Petty Officer 1st Class
Joined
Jan 24, 2002
Messages
240
In case you needed further proof that the human race is doomed through stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.<br /><br />On a Sears hairdryer: Do not use while sleeping. (****, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).<br /><br />On a bag of Fritos: You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside. (The shoplifter special?)<br /><br />On a bar of Dial soap: "Directions: Use like regular soap." (And that would be how???....)<br /><br />On some Swanson frozen dinners: "Serving suggestion: Defrost." (But, it's "just" a suggestion).<br /><br />On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert (printed on bottom): "Do not turn upside down." (Well duh, a bit late, huh!)<br /><br />On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:" product will be hot after heating." (And you thought????...)<br /><br />On packaging for a Rowenta iron: "Do not iron clothes on body." (But wouldn't this save me more time)?<br /><br />On Boot's Children’s' Cough Medicine: "Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication." (We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we could just get those 5-year-olds with head colds off those forklifts.)<br /><br />On Nytol Sleep Aid: "Warning: May cause drowsiness." (And I'm taking this because???....)<br /><br />On most brands of Christmas lights: "For indoor or outdoor use only." (As opposed to what?)<br /><br />On a Japanese food processor: "Not to be used for the other use." (Now, somebody out there, help me on this. I'm a bit curious.)<br /><br />On Sunbury’s peanuts: "Warning: contains nuts." (Talk about a news flash)<br /><br />On an American Airlines packet of nuts: "Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts." (Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)<br /><br />On a child's Superman costume: "Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly."<br />(I don't blame the company. I blame the parents for this one.)<br /><br />On a Swedish chainsaw: "Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals."<br />(Oh my God...was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)<br /><br /><br />Hope you got a chance to smile today :) <br /><br /> :cool:
 
J

JEllwanger

Seaman
Joined
Apr 5, 2001
Messages
56
Re: R Wee Gittin Mor Dummer, Oar R Thaa?

Printed on the cap of a plastic soda bottle:<br /><br />"Contents under pressure. Point away from face and others while opening". <br /><br />Ow! My eye!
 
M

MGuckin

Senior Chief Petty Officer
Joined
Jun 10, 2001
Messages
760
Re: R Wee Gittin Mor Dummer, Oar R Thaa?

Some I found.<br /><br />Warning on a curling iron: Do Not Insert Curling Iron Into Any Bodily Orifice…<br /><br />Seen on the bottom of a Coca-Cola bottle:<br />"Do not open here."<br /><br />On a bottle of bathtub cleaner: For best results, start with clean bathtub before use.<br /><br />This stupid label was found on a can of Woolite carpet cleaner: "Safe for carpets, too!"<br /><br />100% pure all-natural fresh-squeezed orange juice from concentrate.<br /><br />On the back of the Pilots seat on NATO AWAC Aircraft (E-3A), is a sign that states:<br />"Seat must be facing forward for take off and landing."<br /><br />Seen on a container of salt:<br />Warning: High in sodium<br /><br />There is also a stroller on the market with the warning, "Remove child before folding."<br /><br />On the label of Sterno is a warning that says, "Do not use near fire or flame." .<br /><br />On a container of lighter fluid: WARNING: Contents flammable.<br /><br />A full-face motorcycle helmet with a giant arrow pointing to the front. I can only guess<br />that some idiot put the helmet on backwards, jumped on a bike and hurt himself. This is<br />to protect to manufacturer from future lawsuits.<br /><br /> ;)
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Top