Re: The Dock expert
I have four older gentle men that I see almost everytime I go to the boat. Three of them are a wealth of helpful information, “IF” I want it. I love it when they come around, but they generally stay in the background and just observe. Every once in a while one will walk over with the tool box, have a seat and smile. They just hand me tools, and if it looks like I am doing everything right they just make small talk. Every once in a while, they will say something like, did you already check what ever? It has always been small stuff, nothing big, in the end it always started.
One watched me pull my manual starter apart and put a new rope on it, I had never done it before. He didn't say a word the whole time.
When I was finished he smiled real big, and said we should go eat with them some time. I know, had I started screaming, and got mad he would have left, and never talked to us again. He would have also climbed into the boat, and done it for me had I asked.
They are like having a parachute in an airplane, you hope you never need them, but if you do they are there, and ready to help. I love having them around.
The other guy is a “pain in the ***” nut.
He has a small 4stroke motor, that never runs right. He saw me pre-mixing oil in my gas last week and had a fit. You can't put oil in gas! I tried to explain it was a 2stroke, not a 4stroke. He ran off to his car and came back with the manual for his motor, to show me where I was supposed to put it. In the oil tank. Oh! I am sooooo stupid!
Everything I do is wrong. I changed the plugs and he watched, I had the wrong plugs according to him, he uses this type, here put them in. He had extras he would sell me cheap. I tried to explain they maybe right for his Honda 4stroke, but were wrong for my Evinrude 2stroke. He ignored what I had just said and started telling me something else was wrong with the boat.
It just never stops, every week it is something new that I am doing all wrong. He is retired, is always there, and everytime I show up he comes running.
He is loud, obnoxious, and full of stupid sexually derogatory comments about every female that comes into his sight. Age plays no role, anything between 12 and 75 is fair game for him. He does this in front of his wife, who always just stares at the river and says nothing.
He put normal, regular sized bed mattress in the boat last week, and tried to get the teenage girls from the rowing club to go out with him for a little fun. It is a little 12ft fishing boat and the mattress was bigger than the boat!
Sorry for the long post, but those that know me, know by now that ...
P.S. man I hope I don't ever become the dock expert.
