Yesterday I was out for a leisure drive in my quadcab and I noticed this little Prius painted baby-poop-yellow pulling out of the local coffee-snobbery shop. I dropped the shifter in to second as I went by and the rpm's jumped up to around 3500. The exhaust was loud and strong and Mr Fancy Pants nearly spilled his half-caf-skinny-soy-chi-latte in his lap. Of course, I continued on at full throttle to the red light, only using the brakes at the last second.
When he got up to me, he rolled his window down to say something to me and I could just barely smell his granola breath over the heavy aroma of fuel blowing out my exhaust. "You know if you were smart, you would get something a little better on mileage," Mr Fancy Pants declared.
I immediately responded with "you know if you were smart, you would get a better job so you could afford to drive a bigger car."
The call-girl in the seat next to him started in as well, "if you weren't wasting all your money on gas you could afford...."
I cut her off to say, "I could afford what? A better looking street walker than Mr Fancy Pants here?"
Mr Fancy Pants was enraged! "That's my wife you're talking to!"
"I guess you got her working the corner to afford more gas," I retorted.
As the light turned green, he floored his gas pedal in fury. It made this little squeal that sounded like a raped chihuahua. Apparently, he hadn't noticed the officer waiting across the street. I later learned that he got a ticket for drag racing. Just think of all the gas he could have bought for the cost of that ticket?
......Now you guy's angered the lady of the house........im outta here..........
